7 years ago
Look, I know there's a lot of non-binary identities and it seems fucking ridiculous. I agree that it sounds ridiculous, especially when the most vocal non-binary people seem to list their genders as "fuck off*," but here's the thing: a majority of these people aren't doing it to "stick it to the man," nor are they becoming non-binary because it's a cool trend. It's like being gay. They can't help it. Yes, gay people do identify with the their biological sex, but that's not the point - the point is that they can't help being gay anymore than a non-binary can help not being male or female.
It's weird because we don't grow up being taught that stuff, even though they've existed for a really long time.
I don't understand it anymore than you do because I'm a heterosexual cisgendered male. There's no way I would know what it's like to not identify with being either male or female, or feeling like a woman while I have the body of a man. No one can adequately explain it to us.
If they could just identify with being the gender they were born as, I'm sure they'd do it just so they wouldn't have to deal with all the bullshit they get. It doesn't work like that, no matter how convenient it would be. It's just the way they are. "Why can't gay people just be straight?" "Why don't poor people just buy more money?" "Why don't dead people just become alive again?"
*And honestly, I can understand why they list their gender as "fuck off," or some other seemingly pretentious/annoying thing. You're a guy - imagine everyone calling you a girl, or an it, or anything that isn't the gender you are, even after having told them millions upon millions of times. After 5, 10, 20+ years, you just get fed up with it. "What's your gender? No, your REAL gender? I bet you're just doing it for attention!!!!!" 'Fuck off' indeed.
As for the language thing - it's not like we don't make up names all the time. I can name every Pokemon type. Pokemon types aren't made up words, sure, but there's a lot of them. There are more Pokemon types than genders (or they're pretty goddamn close in numbers). If people can remember Pokemon types, they can sure as hell remember genders. Besides, it's not like words haven't been made up before. (There are 50+ Legendary Pokemon alone. Some people can instantly tell what a Pokemon's name is when they see it, despite there being 700+ normal Pokemon, and I can guarantee that at least half of those names are made up.)
By the way, I don't speak any European languages, but I do know that some of them gender specific objects. Why is that? (This one isn't exactly part of the sex argument, I'm just asking since it was brought up. I've just never known why.)
I really don't feel like I'm going to convince you, though. I don't blame you. I'm not exactly an authority on gender studies and I've been wrong before. I just know that people can't help feeling what they feel. They just do. They're in the minority, but that doesn't mean they don't exist and that they don't deserve to be acknowledged. The only reason it would be hard to learn these things in any language is because we've refused to acknowledge them for so long.
Admittedly, he only reason I feel so strongly about this is because I've met real trans people and real non-binary people. Before, I was extremely queerphobic (dunno if that's a word, but I guess you know what I mean). They're not doing it for attention. They're just like you and me - they're real.
They're real, and yet no one acknowledges them. Pokemon, on the other hand...