Can we please not start a god damn post war over politics? I just logged off of Huffington Post to avoid all the "I hate Obama and I hate you too because you agreed with him" shit that I just put up with for the past hour!

It was all actually satire (or whatever you want to call it these days), but I guess you're right in thinking I did just the opposite of prevention by provoking.







Where are all the cakes? Where did the cakes go? I'm not happy with this.

The cake is a lie.

There she is!

Darklioness, you are obviously a communist, and as such are no longer welcome in Scotland. Good day.

I want some lie cake.

Ask and ye shall receive.

Ahhh the rare peace of cake I get to enjoy lol

Sir Deathdrop, I sincerely apologize for showing weakness to communism. They had me in their grasp.


But tonight, we fuck bitches.




Cake for all!



Shit, wait, that would make me a communist. Cake for the rich!

Now all we need is an enraged rabble, and we can suppress a revolution!

EDIT: Wait, since I gave Lucifer cake for no reason, does that make me a secret communist? And since I just told you that under duress, is Bloo McCarthy?

And if so, does that make Lucifer Edward R. Murrow?

Motherfucker, we are the revolution. We can eat our cake, but shit on me sideways if we have to have tea with it!

How about something American, like burrito parlors and sushi bars? That'll show our oppressors!

Wait... So have we overthrown ourselves, then?

Does that sound like a dirty euphemism to anybody else?

If we haven't, then I've failed you, America.



But worst of all, I've failed you, my fellow members.

Unless you like the position.


My god, this was a short war.

This is why I love this thread.

I'm glad no one said "let them eat cake".

Sir Tawg-a-lot, that is a phrase of the race that isn't pale as a ghost's dong! Do you take me for Ancient Roman? Do you see me abusing lions in the workplace? No! I'm here in America, and it's phrases like that that bring our country down!

"Let them eat cake!" ? Blaspheme to the twenty-third power!

Listen. Do you think I like having to shit on people's faces? My throne in my personal bathing area is very cold! Cold like a ghost's bare ass!

No one can terrorize a whole nation, unless we are all his accomplices - and that's why the inferior races lose, because they all revel in and share mediocrity! Sharing cake? Are you kidding me? What next, are we going to share tampons and shop for breast milk? Unprocessed breast milk? America!

Come, my brothers, either bleach your skin or get a slight tan, for it's time we bar-b-que the shit out of some hotdogs and not share them with each other! Because democracy and we are the future and red scare tactics!

Beyond our present is our future, and today is yesterday's tomorrow. I don't know what that means in this context, but you better damn well take something meaningful from it!

You can take our jobs, but you can't take away the very things that define us, like Taco Bell and Benihanas! You can't take our culture away, like Hawaii! Britain? Fuck britain! It's not like we were founded by immigrants - that was Chris Columbus, you cunt muffins!

The only thing we have in common with you communists is having to share at least one thing. What is that? Why, that's freedom, of course!

This is America, bitch! We don't share cake! We sell it in cheap plastic for way over market value!

America!

"Cold like a ghost's bare ass!"

Ingenious.

My computer is about to shut off right now because of the low charge so I started listening to this.

http://www.youtube.com/watch?feature=endscreen&v=NHar3DQy8pk&NR=1

I thought it was a perfect fit.

Reading your comment Bloo has made me realize something that I had thought long gone. I fucking love you American bastards :)

I'm actually Filipino-American, which, I think, makes writing such prideful nonsense much more enjoyable.


...





America!