In Russia, coffin has pipe for air, and bell with string. If man is true Soviet, he does not die. When buried, yells for undertaker and rings bell.
Bell rings. Is no wind.
Undertaker asks - "Are you lady Gorbochev?"
Voice says "Yes!"
"Born winter of 1927?"
"Yes!"
"Gravestone says 'Died 20 February, 1957"
"Niet, am still living!"
"Am sorry, but is August. In June, ground will thaw. You must wait for June."
And woman is true Soviet, waits for June.